It may be a subject that some of you are thinking ‘Not really an issue… Maybe for my straight gal pals but not for me!’ but I’d like to talk about knowing when to put out. If you feel like doing it on a first date are you labeling yourself as a slut? Will he not respect you as much or are there no rules where gay men are concerned? Read on!
Sometimes when we find ourselves sitting in a small stuffy offices looking out the window onto an absolutely beautiful spring day, we start to think about spending some time out and about with some attractive and available gay man, right?! When we find ourselves in this frame of mind in the middle of the day, we must remember that we can simply go online and make use of the many available free gay dating websites, and we will no doubt be able to find some hot male company for that very evening. Is it just the nice weather that is making us want to get out there more and meet some people? I think it has a lot to do with it.
There is often nothing harder than picking ourselves up after a bad, disappointing or failed relationship and trying to find the courage and the motivation to start over, am I right?. When we are ready to venture out into the world of dating once again, we can use the many gay dating sites online to help us ease into the process of meeting new gay men, chatting with them, interacting with them, and hopefully eventually dating them, and possibly forming a relationship or a having a hot hookup with them. But it’s not as easy as that, is it? Don’t we sometimes have to find the motivation and desire to meet someone else and start all over again before we can even imagine getting back out there? Even if it’s just having a profile online?
For all of you who are out there finding hot gay men to go out with online, this always creates the same situation, doesn’t it? After chatting online for a certain amount of time, you begin to feel comfortable enough chatting with him to have reason to think you will also click in person. So after some back-and-forth discussions about where to go and what to do, you finally set up your first official date. You should feel fine about it. After all, he’s not a complete stranger. So why do you suddenly find yourself nervous as anything?
When it comes to gay dating, there can be some traditional ‘rules’ that simply don’t apply to to us like it does for straight couples. Am I right? When it comes to paying for things on a date, it can be hard to draw a line where generosity ends and being taken advantage of starts. I’ve been on more dates than I care to count where I’ve ended up feeling taken advantage of by my generosity. While I’m certainly an advocate that women should pay on heterosexual dates as much as men do, I still get the impression that if the woman is being taken out and shown a good time, at least in theory, most of them seem to expect to not have to pay for anything. How can we take this and apply it to a gay couple then?
When gays date, just like anyone else on earth, they have a wide variety of agendas to choose from when it comes to how to progress and what the end result should be. Falling in love is great, but it isn’t every single person’s goal. Some people actually try to avoid falling in love because they don’t have time or it complicates their lives too much or they simply aren’t up to it emotionally. Some people actively try to find love and are convinced that they can’t possibly be happy until they do find it. Any of these sound familiar?
Gay dating is hard enough- finding a cute guy we want to date, scouring dating sites, parties and clubs- without battling one another’s individual level of comfort over being out or not coming into play. The fact of the matter is how we deal with the world, how important or not our sexuality is to expose and expound over in public or in private and how many people come to know what we do in and with our love life is for each gay guy to determine for himself.
For all the gay men out there who are actively dating, what do you think of this? I just got a letter on Facebook from someone who went on a date with someone he met off of a gay dating site recently and he had an ‘okay’ time but was more excited to go home and watch the premiere of GCB than extend the date any further. He figured that would be the end of it with this particular man, but now he has been asked out again! How can he politely get out of going on a second date? It got me thinking…
Read more after the jump and give your own advice!
Hello to all the hot gay men out there searching for dating tips! I’ve got a question that I’ve been wondering about. What is your ideal date? Obviously this is going to be different for everyone but I wonder about some of the similarities that do exist. In my vast experiences as a gay man dating, it seems like the options come down to one of three things more often than not.
Afternoon to all the lovely gay daters out there. I have a question to pose to you all: When you are going out with someone for the first time, who should pay? I hope we can all agree the days of ‘the man pays’ are long gone when it comes to straight dating, so where does that leave us – or anyone for that matter? I generally subscribe to the ‘whoever does the asking out should be paying’ theory, but it can quickly get more complicated than that.